7:38 p.m. [2002-11-21]

Just when I think I have things settled, it all falls apart.

I felt so sure this was it, like I finally could say I was happy. Sure, I should appreciate the fact my parents work so hard just for me to get a good, college educated life, but I'm still at a loss here.

The feeling of being alone strikes hard, and I don't know how to cure it. Hopelessness goes hand in hand with it. Check my older entries and you'll see how happy I was...or did I just fake? I don't even know.

Sometimes I feel like the only guy is excited to see me is my fish. He goes crazy for anyone though, so even that might not matter.

Should I go nihilistic? Haha... not that far.

Maybe it's the music, I'm listening to a few iffy songs lately.

At least I go home tomorrow. It's been 2 months since I visited...

Overall, the only thing I can say is "I don't know."

OTHER OCCURENCES:
:I'm feeling sick, like a sore throat or something
:It's fridged out
:Got a Taproot cd and the Audioslave cd
:Am disappointed, mostly with myself
:Ok, must think of something positive...uh...turkey soon? Yey!